Naughty SMS for My Viewers

• Sex is like art. Most of it is pretty bad, and the good stuff is out of your price range. -Scott E. Roeben

• Love is not the dying moan of a distant violin- it's the triumphant twang of a bedspring. -S. J. Perelman

• An erection at will is the moral equivalent of a valid credit card. -Alex comfort

• Not only is life a bitch, but it is always having puppies. -Adrienne Gusoff

• I'm definitely claustrophobic. I have a morbid fear of tight spaces. Thankfully, with my girlfriend, I'll never have a problem with that. -Scott E. Roeben

• I am skilled at the art of love. I just wish I had a bigger paintbrush. -Scott E. Roeben

• I guess you could call me a polygamist. Sometimes I switch hands. -Scott E. Roeben

• A man must be potent and orgasmic to ensure the future of the race. A woman only needs to be available. -Masters and Johnson

• An erection at will is the moral equivalent of a valid credit card. -Alex comfort

• A dress makes no sense unless it inspires men to want to take it off you. -Francoise Sagan